Self-Motivation: Developing Emotional Intelligence Stage 3

Development of emotional intelligence is essential for success in all kinds of relationships. This blog series will outline the stages of emotional intelligence development. This post focuses on stage three, Self Motivation.

Stages to Emotional Intelligence Development

  1. Self-Awareness: Acknowledging and coming to terms with personal strengths, weaknesses, bias and attitudes
  2. Personal Emotional Regulation: Learning to self sooth and mindful of feelings
  3. Self-Motivation: Internal locus of control and desire to grow
  4. Relationship Management: Soft Skills
  5. Emotion Coaching: Coach your team to and others on these skills
self motivation
Emotional intelligence mind map flowchart

5 Steps to Self-Motivation

  • Adopt Positive Self-Talk
  • Build a Dream Team Support System (the ‘A’ team)
  • Creative Visualization
  • Create a Delicious Environment
  • Have a Mentor or Have Regular Training

Step 1: Adopt Positive Self-Talk

Develop an excellent inner-voice of a cheer leader or coach.


  • Our current views of ourselves are formed by what we tell ourselves, what others tell us and what others say about us.
  • Affirmations are always written in the positive sense.
    • I am beautiful and loveable
    • I am talented, intelligent and creative
    • I am growing cleverer every day
    • I have much to offer, and others recognize this

Therapist Nicki and Affirmations

Step 2: Build A Dream Team

Working with talented people you can trust is its own motivator. It is important to develop a support system to which you can turn when needed.

Harmony Team
Harmony Team

Step 3: Creative Visualization

  • A central idea is that the brain gives rise to emotional states that will evoke behaviour. 
  • Changing the way you think will change the way you behave.
self motivation

Step 4: Create a Delicious Environment

  • Toys
  • Comfort vs. Discomfort
  • The space needs to feel safe
  • Healthy and Helpful
  • Respectful, Candid, and Transparent
  • Contains Cheerleaders and Coaches
  • Organised and Expectations and Roles are Clear
  • Well-chosen music can leadto:Lower levels of stress
  • Improvements in long-term memory
  • Higher levels of creativity
  • Enhanced learning
  • Desired emotional states
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Step 5: Have a Mentor or Receive Regular Trainings

  • Read the books of successful people
  • Attend conferences
  • Participate in team building activities outside of work
  • Find a Mentor or Coach
  • Clearing groups